A Dark Agent

There is something that I want to share with all of you wonderful followers. Something that has hit home for me really hard.

I don't know how many of you have experienced that entrenching and debilitating power of Depression, but it is an insidious agent that has the power to cripple the mightiest of foes. Why is it so hard to deal with? To recognize? To see? Why is it so prevalent in this world today?

It's a real scary thought. To think that your very mentality is being attacked by environmental and chemical combatants, that you can't necessarily see. I think that is the start of why it is so dangerous. Unlike a Flu virus or a Cold, Depression isn't immediately recognizable. It's silent, it's mental, it's emotional. If I'm coughing or vomiting, I can probably assume that I might have some sort of virus. But how could I know if Depression might be looming around my body? There are bad hair days, there are people how just push our buttons the wrong way, and there is the every present social shame of admitting that you might have a problem with your mind. It is very scary.

I'm going to quote one of our Church Authorities a lot during my blog today, because he puts it so simple and concise as to what Depression is, and what can be done about it. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland stated:

"We sense the complexity of such matters when we hear professionals speak of neuroses and psychoses, of genetic predispositions and chromosome defects, of bipolarity, paranoia, and schizophrenia. However bewildering this all may be, these afflictions are some of the realities of mortal life, and there should be no more shame in acknowledging them than in acknowledging a battle with high blood pressure or the sudden appearance of a malignant tumor."*
 

I like the word complexity. Depression and Mental Illness is a complex problem. It is something that is real. Right here. Right now. We need to face the reality. "There should be no more shame..." What does that mean to you? My heart and feelings goes out to those who are battling with such debilitating diseases as Alzheimer's, Dementia, and other forms of serious mental illness. It is so painful to watch someone go through something so horrible, especially when you have to witness the pain from the family members of the person afflicted. I can't tell you how much what Elder Holland said about this disease meant to me. About God's love, he states:

"So how do you best respond when mental or emotional challenges confront you or those you love? Above all, never lose faith in your Father in Heaven, who loves you more than you can comprehend. As President Monson states, “That love never changes. … It is there for you when you are sad or happy, discouraged or hopeful. God’s love is there for you whether or not you feel you deserve [it]. It is simply always there.” Never, ever doubt that, and never harden your heart..."*
 

There is a lot of judgement that goes on in the world today. Everything is about me. What can I get? How can I get above that person? Why don't I have that instead of him? It seems that judgment intensifies when persons afflicted with Depression come to a realization of their affliction. It's simply horrible. My heart and empathy goes out to those who have been ostracized because of their illness. There is no more destructive act that can happen, in relation to depression, then to have those you thought were by your side, turn judgemental and condescending for something that you or someone close is battling with.

Like I said, and like Elder Holland said. I'm not talking about crazy hair days, bossy colleagues, or an "off day", I'm talking about a dark and silent agent that can take the simplest of things and reverse them into a descending depth of despair. My friends and watchers. Be alert. Be mindful. Be careful to not judge those who seem to be struggling with some inner turmoil.

You never know what someone may be going through. And you could never in your lifetime imagine the struggles or trials another person has to face. You can empathize or sympathize with somethings, but I testify that everyone is different. Everyone is unique. And everyone is human. People make mistakes. People get sick. And people judge others. We need to desist from this, my friends. I have friends and family who have battled with these types of afflictions, and I myself have battled with it. I want you to remember to love these people. Treat them as you would a person with a debilitating cancer, or a severe physical ailment. With love. 

There are lots of things that are afflicting us in our day and age. I just wanted to bring to light what one of them is. Friends, thank you for support. I hope that we can all look upon people that are going through these types of mountainous challenges with a sliver of sympathy, at least. It's just another thing that we, as mortal beings have to deal with, and we need to remember that all of the people around us are mortal as well. We can all be subject to diseases like this, and we just need to help each other with our struggles.

I guess, in closing, I want to give my testimony of Jesus Christ. He really did experience all. All of our worries. All of our fears. All of our sufferings. He truly is the ultimate advocate. I know that He loves each and every one of us. I know He loves me. I know he wants the very best for all, and that he and Jesus Christ really truly love all of us. Why would they have done everything they have done if they didn't? Thank you for reading and listening. I hope that somebody somewhere can be helped or uplifted by my message. Have a wonderful day!

Like a Broken Vessel, October General Conferance 2013, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

Equations Rule Life

Life is one tough equation isn't it? Full of great divides, some positives, multiple negatives, and tons of variables huh? I don't think there is one great solution to our dividends and our problems. There are multiple ways of tackling a difficult problem, but multiple ways of solving

As in math, one has to first identify the part of an equation that needs to be completed before one can actually start on the equation. You then have to examine and find the right variable to input into the equation to solve the problem. Life is a paradoxical equation. There are simple variables, but there are equally and contrasty difficult ones. Each situation and constant is different, yet the same. Where one could divide and conquer a situation, another would problem add and then multiply. So which constant for life can you use with the different constructs of variables to make Life work?

A few months ago, I discovered a sheet that had seven different "rules", if you will, to Life. At first, they seemed quite general and broad, but on closer inspection, they were quite cool. I'd like to share them with you and give my own insights on how each one has fit into different "equations" that I'm dealing or have dealt with in my experience. I hope that through my personal introspection, I can hopefully help someone who reads this! We'll just take each step one by one, and take apart the different sets of the phrases, to better understand the variables and constants we're dealing with for our brushes with Life's problems.


Rule 1: Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

There are things in everyone's past that sometimes sneak out and haunt us. You wouldn't be human without your own skeletons hidden away in some closet. The point and purpose of the past is to be a bridge to your future. The bad mistakes will always seem more apparent then good feelings, but it's both the good and the bad that shape us as human beings and continue building our foundations higher. For me, there's a lot of things I wish I had a DeLorean for, but I guess I wouldn't be who I am right now without some of those things. We've all had that embarrassing moment, failed projects, disappointing results, and things that sometimes fly back at us in the future, but you're human, just make peace with it. We're not perfect, nor should anyone ever hold us to the standard of perfection, because they'd be a hypocrite. Breath, accept, and know that at least you're trying!

Rule 2: What others think of you, is none of your business.

You're looking at a self-identified perfectionist ha-ha. If your tick is to make things perfect, it'd be hard to not think of what others think right? Yep! So, take it from moi that, even though it's really, really hard, just forget about what people think. I don't care if it's Miss America blazoning the Olympic Torch, and sitting on a Lamborghini Aventador, she still wouldn't be perfect. That's because life is an ongoing equation. It's like pi times pi squared, then multiplied and added to a pi to the tenth. It's ongoing!! No one, no matter how perfect they look, is perfect. Everyone has there own demons, their own variables, and their own problems. It's really hard-believe me, not to obsess about what others believe about you. But it really is none of your business. You're a special and unique individual with your own talents, gifts, and personality that you work on! So, smile and just let that Mr. Popular walk by you. You'll probably never see him again anyway!

Rule 3: Time heals almost anything. Give it time. 

This is true for a lot of things we deal with. Sometimes it's the only thing that can really heal injuries. Notice how a lot of these things are connected and work together to make this "Life Schematic". I think Time really just dampens some of the possible pain that may continue seeping outwards from a bad experience. You still may remember the experience, but it's the knowledge and stuff that you learned from it more then the pain I think. I've always said that Time is one of those things that may not always be constant. It could speed up or slow down, maybe even skip by us, but it is also a healer and helper for experiences which are hard to go through. It can heal almost anything!

Rule 4: Don't compare your life to others, and don't judge them. You have no idea what their journey is all about. 

This is closely related with number two. We really don't know what others have been through, do we? Why is that person acting so negatively toward us? Why are they so impatient? What really happens when they're at home? The fact is that there is hardly ever a time in this life when we should ever judge someone for something, and hardly should be emphasized. You have no idea what a person has ever been through or how many miles they've had to walk to get to the point where they've met you. I said it just previously. It's so hard not to compare, but there isn't really anyway you can compare, because you don't know what's hidden beneath a person. How much shaping, heartache, or suffering they've gone through. This is why it's so sad to see bullying in this world today, from both sides of the spectrum. The victims and the bullies just don't know how to deal with any of it, and they just follow the pathetic social norm of achievement comparison and situational attitude, meaning that they just take what they see and what a person may look like, and use that as a judgement indicator. Sorry, but if you do that, then you're gravely mistaken. Focus on your life's journey, and help others in theirs, but just don't judge!

Rule 5: Stop thinking too much, it's alright not to know the answers. They will come to you when you least expect it.

You mean I have to be patient?! Dang it! Curse you unexpected answers, ha-ha! I've been known to overthink things plenty of times, and let me tell you-it doesn't help. We really don't have to know everything. That was never the plan, nor do we have the capability to know everything, and I can't tell you how many times I've been searching for something; whether it be an answer to a question, a writing topic, or just some comfort for lil' old me, the answer came in the weirdest place. So never underestimate where you could get an answer, because it could come in the shower or on the freeway!

Rule 6: No one is in charge of your happiness, except you.  

That is a true statement! Attitude is definitely everything. Being around negative and sarcastic people sucks doesn't it? But, we still hold the responsiblitiy to be our own person and not let others' actions affect us in the wrong way. It's hard! But, we can do it. Just pat yourself on the back for that good patience, because we all get into that situation one time or another!

Rule 7: Smile. You don't own all the problems in the world.

We don't own them. The world is too complex and stupid to try and own every problem in it. You are your own person, and I am my own person. There's lots of things that we could all be depressed about for years, but really, as long as we're doing what we're supposed to, and having fun and living life with those we care about, everything is good. We (that's me too!), need to just smile and let the world just pass on by, because the world will always change for better or for worse, but we can control our own endeavors, and just spend time enjoying life!

I really just offer my realization and testimony of the living Christ that should be the basis for our lives. Notice how each of these could tie in perfectly to how Christ emulated his love for mankind and the attributes he truly showed in his ministry to the people. These may seem like simple steps, but I think that if we take a few of them and really use them with a basis on the Savior, we can achieve great things. I just am so grateful for the limitless blessings that I've had in my life.

I couldn't count them if I wanted to. I can't imagine the agony that Christ went through for us. I'm so thankful to have friends and family in this world, and for little snippets of council like these to help me, and hopefully to help you, on our journey through this complex, mysterious, and scary life. We're not alone though! I know we have Christ with us, and I also give you my love, and hope that you can take away at least a smile from my post! Till I blog again :)!

 

Whisper of the Heart

Friendship: The Web Strands of Life

Hello again everyone!

Thanks for continuing to follow me, and read the different things I've been posting. I sincerely hope that these past posts have at least made you smile, and hopefully left you feeling a bit more cared for. Some of the past blog posts I've done have been about different subjects that have, in someway, related to God and religion. Bad thing? Absolutely not :D! But, I feel inclined to talk about a certain subject that, can also be related to God, but has a more Earthly and subtle tone to it.

I just want you, the reader, to remember that as we take another blog journey together, and as you read on, that the purpose of this blog is to give you the opportunity to build upon your knowledge of Christ, and also let you feel as much love, care, and comfort that I can give you through
a simple computer screen. Enough about introductions-everyone seems to dislike them anyway ha-ha!

Friendship is one of those things that sometimes gets misconstrued in today's society. I would like to enlighten you as to some of the benefits and blessings of friendship, and how, if you don't already, you can get more out of those relationships with those people you hold close to your heart. I guess we'll start with the dictionary definition of "friend" first-might as well put it out there :)! A friend is:

"A person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard." 

I liked the word attached in that sentence. Notice, however, that no where does it say that a friend is simply an item to be had-"A person." I would like to point out that this post, the subjects in it, and the intention behind it is in no way meant to be taken negatively or with ill-feelings. It is merely to expound on what friendship is to me, and hopefully you as well, and give my appreciation and love to the privilege I've had of having so many wonderful, and unique friends.

I always used to wonder why-growing up in this world today, so many people focused so much on how many people they could call "friends", and how much people liked them. If you think about it, isn't that what society views as the focus and function of friends? Simply social status?  Why does it matter how "many" we have, or how much everybody "likes" us? Shouldn't we try to know people who actually "care" about us, and not just "tolerate" us?

I would like to share an example of one of my friends. It's really hard to share just one. It almost makes me teary-eyed thinking about how many people must care about me, and really pray for my success. I might use two or three ha-ha!

The first example I would like to use is one that shows friendship in a different light. I've gotten to know this certain friend over about a year, maybe a year and a half. Because of certain circumstances-him living in Sweden, and me not being rich enough to fly there :), I've only gotten to develop our relationship through other means, but it's really been a great experience. It really didn't matter that much that we couldn't have the physical side of things, and he's been a great help and support for me in times of struggle and hardship.

I don't know about you, but this life would be the worst thing in the entire universe without people to share it with, and people to help us along the way. I like to think that we are taking this journey together, and that our friends are right there beside us, holding our hands and walking with us. It's really special. If you think about it, part of the basis of life's "test" is developing friendships and love with other people. Sometimes it's hard trying to find friends, and sometimes you may feel alone, but there's always someone who loves and cares for you.

I would like you to know that as you read this, I hope you feel at least a little bit cared for. Some if not most of the problems in our degrading society today could be solved if people just tried to care for one another and become friends. I wasn't over exaggerating, nor was I being allegorical when I called friendship the "web strands of life". It is isn't it? Christ should be our foundation for life; church, scriptures, and prayer should be the map to life, and friendship should be the structure of life.

I've said in past blogs that these aren't to promote myself, nor are they to profess my expertise in any such area, but to help and uplift anyone who reads them. You're probably going to get tired of me saying that, but there it is, he-he. If you ever need someone to talk to, or give you some hope to look forward to, I know a few people ;)! I hope that you have gotten a smile out of this, and realize how precious your friends are, and how essential they are to life's journey.

Before I end this post, I'd like to share one more example of one of my friends. This is another friend who I haven't met in person, but we've talked on just about everything else you can imagine, and I have met him "face to face". Anyway, he's what I would consider as a "forever friend". Sometimes these friends are one in a million, other times they are right in front of us, but I'm taken back to the quote that states:

"Honestly, i don't need someone that sees what's good about me. i need someone that sees the bad and still wants me :)"

This certain friend has definitely seen my bad side sometimes. Yeah we've gotten furious at each other plenty of times, but he's still with me. We still talk, we still cry together, and we still uplift each other. I don't think we come by "forever friends" that often in life, and when we do we might miss them. But I can't tell you how much it makes my heart lift, and how much it makes my tears water when I feel the care that these friends have for me.

Without structure, life would fall apart-without friends, the journey isn't worth walking. So please watch out for them, and make sure you're not running the track of life's race too fast, to miss the people that are cheering you on...

I love you all, and thank you for continuing to follow my blog. I wish you a great week, and a sunny day!

Love: An Eternal Remedy for Pain

I don't know about anyone else, but I just love love. Does that make sense? No? He-he, well I'll explain that statement! It doesn't matter if you're a parent, a child; student, or spouse, a sister, or a brother-we all can feel love. There are some people in the world-maybe even you reading these words right now, who unfortunately haven't gotten to feel loved or cared for. I'm truly sorry if you haven't, but I hope that with this, and as you read my words, that you can feel that love that I have for you already.

You may ask, "Well how can this person
who I don't know already love me?" Good question, and here's the answer: It's because I know that everyone has worth, and most people, if you’re really look deep enough, just need a hug or at least some form of affection or acknowledgement. Am I professing to be this wonderful, love-filled person, who just goes around and hugs everyone? No. I do love hugs, but I'm still a human. I still get frustrated, upset, and impatient with many things-including people, but that's part of life and part of being a human. I may not be able to look at everyone I meet and just be a loving person upfront, but I do try my best.

I really like how the dictionary defines love. It's simple, sweet, and you can really feel love for the definition, if that isn't an epitome of a cliché'. Love is defined as a profoundly, tender, passionate affection for another person. It's really easy isn't it, to become frustrated with someone? It seems that it is really easy for us to look at a person and automatically start finding what's wrong with him or her. We all do it-I do it, no one is innocent from this, but it's something that we can improve and work on as we grow closer to one another.

Think of how much different life would be-how different the world would be, if people took a step back, and got over themselves. Remember that as I'm talking, this is applying to everyone including myself :)! But think about it. Think about the conflicts, the economic condition, the programs, the welfare, the poverty, disease, despair, and fear-All of it. What would fix everything? Do I need to say it? Apparently I do, because the world hasn't gotten it yet unfortunately. It's love, my friends.

As a member and representative of Jesus Christ, and of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I've had the opportunity to study the Bible, and the other main book of scripture that we use called-The Book of Mormon. Now I won't get into too much detail about the book just yet, as I want to focus on this overlying idea of love, but basically the Book of Mormon is an ancient and past record of the people and prophets of the American continent that lived here many generations ago. Similar to the Bible-which is an ancient record of the prophets and people that lived in Egypt, Israel, and Jerusalem-the Book of Mormon goes hand-in-hand with the Bible to relate truths that the Bible leaves slightly vague or unexplained.

Within the Book of Mormon, near the end, one of the prophets is describing Jesus Christ, and what his example and his teachings should mean to us. I'm going to quote from the prophet Moroni-one of the last prophets in this record, and this is in the 7th chapter of Moroni near the end of the Book of Mormon:

"And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things...But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him..." (Moroni 7: 45, 47-Book of Mormon)

Let's think about that for a moment. So charity is the pure love of Christ. Love. And it endureth all things and is forever. My readers, friends, fellow ministers, and loving family-Love is the antidote to pain, and is the remedy for any and all situations that cause grief. I hope that if you're reading this, you've felt loved-because I love you. I'm not perfect. No. But through my experiences up to this point in life, I know that to feel loved and cared for is one of the most special and intimate feelings in the universe.

I testify and exhort you to try to love a little more. But more important than trying to love others, you need to start loving yourself as well. If you can't love yourself, you can't love other people. We're all different people. This ignorant status-quo paradigm that the world has shoved into our faces is absolutely and irrevocably false, and it's getting worse and worse. You. Yes you reading these words right now. You are special; this is me telling you right now, that you are loved! Look in the mirror, and give yourself a hug from me :)!

That's something I pray for everyday-to be able to have a better capacity to love, because I don't have the best control in the world-who does? But I know that Jesus Christ loves me, and so does our Heavenly Father. It may be hard. I know that some people have a harder time of loving themselves and other people than others-I'm probably one of them, but just remember:

"Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thysel: I am the Lord." (Leviticus 18:19-Old Testament)

It's really hard sometimes I know that, but just stay strong, and if anything just love yourself and realize that you are loved ^_^!

I would finally exhort you to seek out for people to give you love-sometimes you just need someone to say something nice to you, or to acknowledge you. I would put my invitation out there that if anyone needs some care, you can always seek Jesus Christ...and the Elders :D!

I love you my friends, and fare thee well till next time!

The Power of Prayer

During the occupation of the German Nazis into Poland, many of the cities throughout the country lay barren or secluded from the world through much of the war because of the increased enemy force throughout the nation. Warsaw laid in ruins, tanks roamed the streets, and German soldiers gathered people into different sections of the city to keep them contained, put them to work, or transfer and transport different groups to other places in Poland and Germany to work or to die.

During the heart of World War II-nearing the end of 1943, occupation of the country was already completed, and numerous amounts of the citizenship had already been killed or had died because of the harsh conditions. I would like to tell you about one instance during the occupation in where-despite the dark status and sheer miserable state in the country at the time-hope still remained, and chivalry wasn't lost.

We come to a young man named Damian Pawel-a seventeen year old young man, and a member of the LDS church since 1938. His family had been living on the outskirts of Warsaw when the German invasion forces had begun bombardment on the ill prepared city. Being located out of the main district of the city, and having their home in what we would call suburbs, they were slightly more fortunate then most who resided in the cities' boundaries. Not all was well however. As tanks and raids swept the area, more and more troops poured into the city, and continued sweeping the area like a force unto no other.

Damian and his family had gathered up what they could and fled their home in their little family car. Only fifteen minutes after driving down one of the dirt roads of the countryside away from Warsaw did the area near them explode with bombing shells from the planes overhead. The family wasn't hurt-thankfully, but the car had swerved because of the force of the explosions and had wrecked against a tree line by the road. Quickly and without any thought, Damian had helped his family out, and grabbed whatever he could as they fled into the forest towards what they thought and hoped was one of the smaller towns.

With his parents ahead continuing to push forward, and Damian behind his younger, eight year old sister Monika, they continued to run. Every flash and bang in the distance shocked each of them, and the slight pang of fear always was blazoned on their faces. The treeline for the opposite side was approaching, and threw the rivers of sweat coming off of them, they could see the clear fields again. They past the treeline and continued down the line as they looked around for something...anything. Then they saw it then. Half a mile to the right, across the fields, Damian spotted what probably was the town of Gmina Izabelin-an area where the village of Izabelin was.

Running and running-the family reached the town and continued to hear the bombing and the ever reaching sounds of the German invasion. A quick tap on the shoulder startled young Damian, and he turned around and beheld an elderly gentleman and his frail looking wife. They pointed to a small building and led them toward it-inside the building was just a small room, and one cupboard-probably not any bigger then a broom closet. Outside, the explosions were still booming off, and the crackling of tanks and planes getting closer. Damian looked out the window with fear and desperation in his eyes. He loved his family so much and in the face of certain demise, felt his hope start dwindling. The couple pushed and edged the family into the small cupboard, and then quickly ran out of the building-probably to go get there family somewhere safe, or find some place else to hide.

It didn't take long for the sounds of German soldiers to reach the young families ears, and Damian spent the entire time hugging his family and trying to hold onto his hope. A passing thought in his mind gave him that sliver of hope and, while holding his family, and in his staggered speech he uttered a simple, but teary eyed prayer. "Oh Lord my God, my family is the life of my soul, I pray thee protect them, our trust is in thine hands."

A simple glance over to the closet would have been enough to know that it was occupied. The building which they were in was only a bit more then a shack, and the soldiers persisted to find everyone in the town-ripping up boards and crashing through doors. Through the entire two hours of them tearing the town apart, did the closet door get searched? No it didn't.

-----------------------------------------------

Words cannot express what this must have meant to this young man who was facing pure destruction and darkness, and the thought of losing those who he loved so much. But with the words of a simple, humble prayer-a prayer that showed his utter dependence and love for his family, and his God, coupled with the courage and the Christ-like actions of that elderly couple, saved Damian's family from what would have been the end, in retrospect.

I would like to testify to you readers of the power of prayer. We may not be facing a hostile invasion force-the explosions of bombs and guns going off, or the thought of being killed, but we have our own mountains to climb, we have our families to hug, and we are always at war. Heavenly Father loves each one of us with a love that would echo a thousand universes. We are his children, and he loves, and looks forward to hearing each of us in our prayers to him. I encourage all of you to pray if you haven't prayed in a while. Express gratitude and love for your Heavenly Father, and he will respond.

I know that he loves us, and that he loves me. I don't know what it's like to face death with the prospect of losing my family, but I do know how the emptiness of loneliness and loss feels, and having a Father in Heaven who sends his spirit and the love from his son Jesus Christ, is a blessing indeed. May we continue to feel that loving affection and feeling from him and continue to pray with tender hearts, and loving souls.

I love each of you-even though I might not have met you yet. To all the family and friends who read this-my love goes out to you as well, and I hope that you can get a "hug" from reading this. I wish you a great weekend and an even greater hope!

Till next time! :)